Friday, October 23, 2009

The Beginning

bright autumn leaves
takes me back
to that cool crisp day
as I watched you
so unaware
etching the perfect portrait
in my mind
of you
and the falling leaves
surrounding you
capturing a permanent
mental image
of being so in love..

Saturday, October 17, 2009

Rutger 357 Magnum

On a beautiful fall day
There was a
Five Gallon Bucket
Filled with water
Sitting in front of a tree

My hands are steady
Looking at the red

On a beautiful fall day
Five Gallon Bucket
Filled with water
Sitting in front of a tree
A tree
with the bark missing in

Saturday, October 10, 2009

Birthday Prayer

Dear Heavenly Father,
44 years ago today
YOU brought me into this world,
Through the years
YOU have picked me up repeatedly
out of the mud
the pit of mud
that I seem so determined
to keep jumping in to!!
What a loving, forgiving God you are
for someone like me
who is so unworthy of YOUR saving grace!!
I am so blessed from the life you have given me!!!
44 years ago today
I was put here for a purpose
It is high time
I find out just what that purpose is
Please forgive me for the many mistakes
I have made
and the many sins I have committed!!!!
Thank you Lord
for not giving up on me!!!
Thank you
In Jesus name,

Monday, September 28, 2009


for the
leaves of color
to dance quietly
and the crisp air
to kiss my skin
through the viewfinder
I will see
My Girls
framed by
God's Beauty-
Family Fall Road Trip

Thursday, September 24, 2009

Friday, September 18, 2009

eyes brown as chocolate
blue eyes like the ocean
straight brown hair
curly blonde hair
I am so in love-
My Two Daughters

Sunday, September 13, 2009

Shedding tears of regrets
feeling so unworthy-
I hear CHILD I am still here!
I still LOVE you
Just let go and I will show you the way....

Tuesday, September 8, 2009

Sitting in a chair
I look at the clock
Early morning
I am in my world
Numb at the moment
When I decide to check the time
It is now late afternoon
I need to move
My mind screams at me
Get up!
I am in my world
I can not make myself move
I check the time
I start to feel panic
I hear screaming in my head
As the day goes from light to dark
I want to cry
Everything in my world is heavy
I can not will my arms and legs to move
Darkness has arrived
I get up
I go to bed
Knowing I have to work tomorrow
I have to get up
I have no choice
But in my mind
I am still frozen in my chair...

Saturday, September 5, 2009


Sleepless night with spinning mind
Watching you sleep
Thinking of all the years
I have been beside you
Waiting for the rocking chair and the grand kids......

(Rerun in Celebration of my 27th Anniversary Sept 8)

Tuesday, September 1, 2009

stands one small sign
due to emotional repair

Saturday, August 29, 2009


Entranced she watched you
suffering from a deja vu moment
caught in a endless time
She was mesmerized by memories
haunted by the pain
with images twisting and turning
Insanity waiting impatiently
to consume what little mind she had left
Every ounce of self respect was gone
and the warmth of her tears
brought little comfort to the emptiness inside
She wants to feel
She wants to feel nothing
Absolutely nothing
If only for a little while....

Saturday, August 22, 2009

whisper pink
soft lacy cheek peek
with a preview sneak
making him weak-
Victoria's Secret
very sexy dare-
emotional pendulum
swaying back and forth

Thursday, August 20, 2009

song plays in my car
bringing tears to my eyes-
unrequited longing

Wednesday, August 19, 2009

the brush of his hand
softly touches my arm-
fire in my veins

Thursday, August 13, 2009

with strength of iron
and power of knowledge-
reverse is broken

Monday, August 10, 2009

morning sound returns
announcing summer's end-
big yellow school bus

Wednesday, August 5, 2009

The End to a Perfect Summer

I will always remember
our late night swimming in the pool,
our long 4 wheeler rides in the mountains,
the weekend in a cabin and
fishing on the river,
We played badminton with our grown kids
and laughed at memories of when they were young
We watched movies til early morning hours
and slept in the next day
I will always remember the summer of "09"
and the memories of the summer we met
Long ago...
As each summer passes
Our story ends another chapter of our lives
but we know it is just the end of a chapter
and the beginning of one that is waiting to be written...

Sunday, August 2, 2009

Today is the later on
that he told her back then..
Tomorrow is the now
that he said would no longer happen...
The lady wants to know

Thursday, July 30, 2009

Rollercoaster roll on WITHOUT me

Have you ever felt like you were on a rollercoaster in life? Just as that rollercoaster starts to slow down and you get ready to get off. Someone hits the fast button and your head slams against the back of the seat. I just want someone to push the stop button and let me off!!

Wednesday, July 29, 2009

Deja Vu

I closed the door,
you opened it up..
I locked the door,
you found the key..
I left the door open,
and you slammed it in my face...
I left the door closed,
and you tore it down....
The new door is up
and bolted tight...
You decided to leave it be,
and to leave it be,
and to leave it be....
I relaxed......
then I heard it,
a small knock
and it got louder,
and louder..
I opened the door
and there you stood..
in the doorway of my heart.......

Monday, July 27, 2009

Years Gone By

A kiss so passionate
that my lips sting for moments.
The racing of my heart so strong
I can hear it.
I can feel your hand
as you run it through my hair.
I can hear your voice
whispering to me.
The look in your eyes,
the heat of your body,
still radiates through me
like lightning in a storm.
After all of this time,
You still take my breath away....

Saturday, July 25, 2009

My Best Friend

You know all of my deep , dark secrets
You know all of my fears and worries
You know all of my likes and dislikes
You understand my moods,
You understand my emotions,
Never does a day go by
that you are not here for me
Never does a day go by,
that I can't cry on your shoulder
You listen with patience and understanding
You support every new adventure
that I take on,
Even though you wonder
why I choose certain things in my life,
or why I do not choose certain things in my life
You have never judged me,
or turned your back on me
YOU are the sister I never had....

Thursday, July 23, 2009

sweetness touches my tongue
feel the burn inside of me-
caramel java

Wednesday, July 22, 2009

Summer was my MENTAL get away and got away I did.......But of course when you think you have got where you were going, you come across road construction. The same road you thought was finished....You know the guy, the one with the orange vest, who makes you to take the detour. The detour that sends you in the opposite direction of your destination....Stupid guy, with the stupid orange vest!

Wednesday, July 15, 2009

Hello Friends,
I am headed to the White River tomorrow for a few days . I plan on doing some trout fishing, swimming and spending quality time with my family. It is absolutely beautiful where we are going. Gorgeous Bluffs all around. Hope to get a lot of good pictures and do a little writing, a lot of relaxation time :) School starts back in a few weeks and I really need this to get mentally prepared for my kiddoes. Just wanted you to know I had not deserted your wonderful stories, photos, and poetry. I will catch up on it all when I get back. Love to each and everyone of you who visit my site and leave your wonderful comments. You are my blogging family who I am so happy to have come in contact with!!!

Hugs and Kisses,

Thursday, July 2, 2009

Rise up and feel the sun and the breeze
embrace you
as the sounds of nature
sings a song
Close your eyes and dive into
the cool water
as it kisses your skin
Let the water wash away the tears
and bring healing
to your ...
Broken Heart

Monday, June 29, 2009

light from the moon
reflects across the water-
night swimming

Thursday, June 25, 2009

eyes meet on a hot, humid day
words are spoken in the present form..
one who listens with emotion
the other hears with regret..
this is the end of-
the unwritten story

Saturday, June 20, 2009

eyes fly open
at the sounds of morning-
the barn dance

Tuesday, June 16, 2009

with lips tasting of rain
your touch as powerful as thunder
your breath whispers to me
like wind through the pines
remembering our-
silent storm

Monday, June 15, 2009

champagne bubbles
dance wildly in the bottle
your image appears

Friday, June 12, 2009

heart race, mind twirl
body tingle, quick breath
vivid fireworks
you are my -
panic attack

Wednesday, June 10, 2009

floating in water
watching the clouds pass by
I hear your voice,
whispering" I love you"
you are only in my dreams...

Monday, June 8, 2009

look above the trees
dark sky looks down
summer morning rain

Friday, June 5, 2009

Morning Stroll

One foot in front of the other
I know I can do this!
Slowly and steadily climbing
I am positive I can achieve my goal!
Each step difficult and painful
Focusing on the top of boy scout hill
I am almost to my destination
Then I finally see
My view of the rising sun....

I added 3 new photos to my photo blog, it has been awhile. Hopefully I can start to update daily :)

Tuesday, June 2, 2009

Thursday, May 28, 2009

Wednesday, May 27, 2009

Monday, May 25, 2009

let go of the rain
sun sets behind the mountain
summer surprise

Saturday, May 23, 2009

I hope to get back to poetry in the next few days. It is the end of the school year and so busy. I have just got back from our Arkansas State Special Olympics.. I am exhausted but had a wonderful time. It is so wonderful to watch and touches your heart so much!! Powerlifting is my favorite event, our kids train for it all year. Three of them took all gold and one all bronze, they have worked so hard and I am so proud of them!!! I hope everyone is doing well and I just wanted to share with you one of the things that is very special to me!!! Thanks to all who visits my site!!

Sunday, May 17, 2009

the sun shines brightly
as the shadow starts to grow
barn raising

Saturday, May 16, 2009


It is the first thing I think of when I wake up
and the last thing I think of when I go to sleep
It is in my dreams, in my mind, in my heart..
The world is passing by me as I am in my own world
not hearing, not seeing, just thinking....
I can not get away because it is everywhere I look...
Wondering how to break the cycle of my
Unhealthy Obsession.....

Monday, May 11, 2009


Time on the clock
stands still on Monday
memories of time
that never was-
secondhand broken....

Saturday, May 9, 2009


My phone rings
I look at the caller id to see who it is
Upon answering it
I hear "what are you doing"?
I give a response
and as we talk ,
I think about all of the talks we have had
and all the talks we will have
knowing that we are not getting any younger
I hear her say "Did you watch Grey's Anatomy last night"?
Then we proceed to talk about if Izzy will really die or not,
I laugh as we share a fun moment talking about one of our favorite shows
and I know that it is not only MY MOM, that I am listening to
She is also my best friend.....

I have a wonderful mom who has always been there for me and I love her with all my heart. I know how fortunate I am to have her and how very blessed my life has been because of her.
Happy Mother's Day to all of the women who has ever loved a child. Happy Mother's Day to anyone who has called someone MOM..

Monday, May 4, 2009

whisper softly
my heart flutters wild
tell me of life ahead
secure from the past
married hands

Saturday, May 2, 2009


This feeling I have
the one that keeps taking me by surprise
This pain in my heart
the one that causes this overwhelming need to cry
The insanity in my mind
the one that makes me not sleep
I take all the pieces of my heart
and all the pieces of my mind
Putting the puzzle back together
thinking I have completed it
Then you walk by and knock it off the table
Now I am looking for the glue
to keep the pieces together
So when I fall
I will still be whole....

Monday, April 27, 2009

look with prying eyes
into the depth of my vision
and you will hear
the story that
can never be told....

Wednesday, April 22, 2009

alone in the shade
with arrogance and splendor-
single white iris

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

I am taking things from a poem I wrote earlier and trying my hand at these various forms of poetry....Let me know what you think..Thanks to all for your input and help, I enjoy it so much.....

rain on thirsty soil
water collects, puddles form
necessary tears.

Sunday, April 19, 2009

Today's post is not poetry. It is questions to anyone who is willing to take on my simple mind.
I have read several of the post of my readers and ones that have been archived. I have read several of Andy's or Andrew as he is usually called. I have read Tangled in Wisteria. I have read Devika's and Magyar's as well. I love the haiku, but it is very new to me. I do not always understand it, but most of the time I get so much meaning from so few words. I know Andrew puts various labels, tanka being one and haiga. I have no idea what that means. I find it is better to be honest about not knowing things than to pretend to know something I do not. I would like to attempt some of these various forms of poetry. I am not sure I can do it, because I tend to get very wordy as you can see. I guess my question woud be .. Could you explain to me and give me some pointers on the various types? I am one who likes to just flow from the heart and mind, I am a free spirit. Thank you for all your help and your wonderful compliments. I am loving this new blogging adventure!!!

Saturday, April 18, 2009

Alone with my Thoughts

No one is home and I am
Stretched out in my husbands recliner
covered by a soft warm blanket
wearing my sweats and fuzzy socks.
Reading a good book
under a small lamp
in my dark house..
My dog Oscar is asleep
in the floor.
Being all alone does not always mean being

Thursday, April 16, 2009


Washing away the tears with silence
of a unsuspecting sadness
within the secret chambers
of my heart.....

Monday, April 13, 2009

Nature's Song

Through my window
The tree limbs are softly swaying
I only hear silence
Through my window
The birds are fighting over dinner at the feeders
I only hear silence
Through my window
The wind chimes are gently swinging
I only hear silence
Opening up my window
I only hear music......

Friday, April 10, 2009


They walked down the long winding road
Hand in hand
She stops ,turns, and looks behind her
He continues to look ahead
He takes her hand and pulls her in a direction she has never been.
She digs her heels in, fights to go back
to where she came from, scared to go on...
He calmly takes her in his arms and says
Today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday
Tomorrow is the day you are worrying about today
If you live for yesterday, and you worry about tomorrow
When did you live for today?
She looks at Him and starts to weep,
He smiles and says Dear Child, No matter what life brings you I will be there to pick you up,
dust you off, and send you in the right direction.
All you have to do is trust and believe in Me TODAY
and there will never be reason to worry about tomorrow!

Happy Easter everyone!!

Thursday, April 9, 2009

Ticking Clock

Each day passes by
It becomes weeks
Weeks leave us quickly
It becomes months
Months become seasons
Seasons become years
Never too old to learn something new......

Monday, April 6, 2009

Slippery When Wet

Standing in the rain
Water streaming down my face
Puddles forming all around me
Necessary tears.....

Saturday, April 4, 2009

Is Love Enough

40 plus years gone by
Now the the time stands still for a moment
Memories of childhood
Mine and theirs
Holidays with grandparents
Who have long been gone
All the memories with my mom and dad
Looking ahead to times to come
I watch my oldest daughter
celebrate her wedding anniversary
Knowing how much she wants children of her own
I watch my youngest fall in love
Knowing how much she thinks about her future
Cherishing the moments my girls have with my parents
Watching us all get older
Wishing I could slow down the time
I worry about all the mistakes I have made
Asking myself what kind of
daughter, granddaughter,wife and mom I have been
Wondering how my family would answer
Wondering if they know through all the changes
All the moods, that I love them with all my heart
Just wanting them to know I was trying to find me
Praying that my love was enough........

Friday, April 3, 2009

Start to Finish

Starting the story
Living the story
Ending the story
Telling the story
Coming full circle.....

Wednesday, April 1, 2009

Just Being ME

Painting anything
No design
Looking at the picture
I see me
Unusual, different
Just letting it flow over the canvas
Every word has meaning
Some say the same
Others say not
Colors in my mind
with words on the side
Feeling so free.....

Sunday, March 29, 2009

Special Love

Watching the child in my classroom
Who is watching me
She turns her head slightly
Never taking her blue eyes off me
I put my my hands on my hips
She does the same
I laugh and walk over to her
She says HUG
I give her a hug and kiss her on the cheek
and I look into those eyes
Eyes I have looked into numerous times
over the last few years
I see the love for me in those eyes
I know she loves me as much as I do her
I often wonder what is going on in her mind
when she sees me
Wondering as she graduates
If in her mind she will remember me
and if she will miss me
We share a special bond
That started from the very beginning
We have had some very hard days together
Always managing to make it through
Just for a moment I would like to look through her eyes
See what she sees and feel what she feels
So that I could understand
Just for a moment I would like for her to see into my heart
And know that I love her as much as if she were my own....

Working in a special education classroom can be very tough, but the love I feel for these kids and the unconditional love they give me is the most rewarding job anyone could have. They are Gods Angels!! This young lady graduates this year and she is very, very dear to me...

Saturday, March 28, 2009

Deep Quiet Satisfaction

Sitting in the dark rocking
I can hear the rain hitting the roof
and smell coffee brewing from the kitchen
I am completely enjoying my lazy Saturday morning
But with sadness I realize spring break is over
and with a thrill of excitement
I know summer is on the way.....

Friday, March 27, 2009


Walking in the room she lays down her things
He looks up at her taking in what she wore
They say their hellos before talking about their night
As she turns to listen to him
Their eyes meet with unspoken words
He stands and leans close
whispering in her ear
She looks at him and smiles
She reaches up straightening his collar
and her breath quickens as he moves a strand of hair from her face
I read in her face the memory of
The Last Kiss
The Last Touch
Both of them so unaware
I just read their secret......

Thursday, March 26, 2009


When I think of summer
I think of you
Long warm days
Swimming in the creek
Getting to know your likes and dislikes
Listening to the stories about your brothers
Taking long drives in your 69 Ford pickup
I think back and remember the night we sat on the grass watching the fireworks
I felt so safe with your arms wrapped around me on that warm 4th of July night
That was the night I knew I had fallen in love with you
My husband of 26 years......

Monday, March 23, 2009

Flat Ground

Adrenalin flowing
Heart racing
Closing my eyes
Hanging on with all my strength
Holding my breath
Feel the fear
Feel the excitement
What turn is coming soon
Opening my eyes
Riding the roller coaster of life......

Sunday, March 22, 2009


I know what is in my mind
I know what is in my heart
Separating the two is the problem......

Saturday, March 21, 2009

Two plus One equals Four

Two actors in a play
One person
Three characters in the story
Three people
Three members in the audience
Curtain closed
Six people in the theater
Many, many extras have come and gone
Two actors in a play
Same person
Two totally different people
One mind
Two people, one heart
Two people , two hearts
Added all together equals

Friday, March 20, 2009


When I think of you I smile
I go back in time and I can hear your voice
I think of the thousands of beads, all the yarn, and how creative you were
I go in my kitchen and pick up a cookbook written by you
I laugh at the words that are not really words
But they are your words and the recipes you have created
Time passes and we have moved on with our lives
and I ache for all the things you have missed
the graduations, the weddings, the babies
When I take a look around
I see your face
I see your smile
I see your eyes
I see you in the man I love
I see you in both of my beautiful girls
I thank God for your three sons
and your six grandchildren
and your two great grandchildren
I thank God for you
If not for YOU, the family I love would not have had LIFE........

In loving memory of my mother- in- law Charlene Cowan Brown

February 8 1938 - March 7, 1999

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

Just One MInute

As I walk across the bridge
I listen to the waterfall in the distance
I breathe in the sweetness of the early spring air
Looking up at the mountains
I see the leaves turning green
Cherishing this moment with God's creation
Loving the peace and quiet
I feel the warmth of the sun on my face
Just for a minute
Just one minute
I closed my eyes and the noise in my classroom
Faded AWAY......

Monday, March 16, 2009

The Beginning after The Ending

Looking and looking and I still can not see
Watching and waiting for the dust to settle
Ducking and dodging the flying debris
Trying to be patient
Wondering and hoping the storm will end soon
Waiting to survey the damage
Wishing and praying it is about to end
Trying to be patient
As my vision starts to clear
and the storm is about to calm
with patience I know you and I made it.....

Sunday, March 15, 2009

A New Day

I pick up the snow white canvas
and position it on the easel
As I take the brush and dip it into the paint
I watch the colors blend into the surface
I know I can use any color to cover the canvas
and as I paint it comes alive with emotion
The color dances with shadows and beauty
Giving me freedom to speak through my minds eye
I know as I paint if I make a mistake
That the magic of painting compares to life
Just pick up and start over............

Saturday, March 14, 2009

The Word Is

I look at the words
which at one time made me smile
I read the words
which at one time would have made my day
I think about the words
which at one time I would have believed
But now when I listen to the words I read
and I absorb what they mean
Now I understand the thought of meaningless words......

Friday, March 13, 2009


Through life we find friends
who will be with us from now on
and then there are those who just pass through our lives.
Circumstances bring people together,
some good , some bad,
and we always wonder why.
We feel our friends pain as they do ours, sometimes pain
and heartache is what causes us to find them.
We understand them because they are so like us,
with all the mistakes, sometimes huge ones ,
but through our friends
we can recover and grow and forgive,
knowing if we could go back in time
we would change things
or would we
that awful circumstance maybe
the reason we found each other.......

Thursday, March 12, 2009


Sense of peace overcoming me
Calmness in a painted picture
Weight lifting off the page as the words are written
Focusing on my thoughts of color in nature
Feeling the air cover me like a soft blanket
Breathing slowly as my eyes shut
Having the knowledge of being ok........

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Last Chapter

Creating drama and living it
A novel come to life
Feeling the rain on my face
As I watch the words in front of me
Grow with increasing suspicion
Unsettling thoughts with pain in tow
Is this the last chapter
Is the novel about to end
Closing the book with sadness and relief.


Sleepless night with spinning mind
Watching you sleep
Thinking of all the years
I have been beside you
Waiting for the rocking chair and the grand kids......

Tuesday, March 10, 2009


I breathe in the scent
I listen to the sound
Quietly breathing
Chest rising and falling
I can almost hear the heartbeat
Taste the kiss
Feel the touch of hands
Through a broken pane of glass.......